God, I miss you so much right now... More than usual, and it hurts so bad....

I know I'm torturing myself and making it worse by reading your old emails to me and our old conversations, but I just want to remember that you cared about me and wanted me. I don't know what you want anymore... but at least I did once...

I've spilled more tears over you than I have over any other boy... It just doesn't make sense to me and I don't know what to do about it...

I don't want to hurt anymore... but I don't want to give up.

I know I won't ever really give up on you.
I'm not strong enough to do that...